Thought Gardens

When I was an avid gardener, I would stock up on seed catalogs and spend the winter imagining what I would plant come spring. Those little packets held so much potential. But to see the beautiful flowers, I had to put the tiny seeds in soil and care for them with water and sunshine.

Like gardens, experiences seed our minds. We can choose what grows in our thought gardens by nurturing the growth of beautiful thoughts and pulling out the ugly weeds.

The most invasive and destructive weed is bitterness. Hebrews 12:15 says, “Look after each other so that not one of you will fail to find God’s best blessings. Watch out that no bitterness takes root among you, for as it springs up it causes deep trouble, hurting many in their spiritual lives.”

An article by Psychology Today writes, “Feeling bitter is the likely consequence of feeling invalidated and unappreciated in one too many situations and relationships…a victim mindset can take hold, increasing overthinking, emotional numbness, and isolation.”

When we don’t honor our own boundaries, stand up for ourselves, or when we bottle up our emotions, resentment seeps in, blocking forgiveness and taking root as bitterness. Saint Augustine said, “Bitterness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

Although we may try to direct our anger at the source of our pain, being bitter is completely self-destructive. Maya Angelou says, “Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. It doesn’t do anything to the object of its displeasure.” The person responsible for your pain is clueless, while you live out the consequences of harboring the hurt. I like Karen Salmansohn’s advice, “Let the bitterness go. When someone treats you like crap, just remember it’s because there’s something wrong with them, not you.”

Get out in the sunshine. Sow some love and forgiveness. Pull up—no—dig up those ugly weeds of bitterness and enjoy the gently breeze and sweet perfume of your beautiful thought garden!

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:31-32